Drivers disobeying the rules of the road were stopped by police overnight.
Between Saturday night and Sunday morning, Wiltshire Police's roads policing unit officers patrolled two main roads that cut through Swindon.
At around 2.30am, they noticed a Mercedes going 109mph down the M4, and the driver's excuse for this illegal behaviour didn't wash.
The police spokesperson added: "Driver stated he was speeding to answer an urgent call of nature.
"Court appearance awaits."
Around two hours earlier, they were "surprised" to find an Audi straddling both lanes of the northbound A419 with its hazard lights on and only going 30mph.
A police spokesperson said: "We weren't surprised to find the driver was drunk.
"He failed to provide a specimen and had two previous convictions for drink driving.
"Court awaits."
Drink driving and speeding are two of the five most common causes of fatal road accidents. Wiltshire Police has an ongoing 'Fatal Five' campaign to crack down on drivers who are guilty of these offences before such accidents occur.
The other three of the five most common causes are careless driving, not wearing a seatbelt, and using a handheld mobile phone while behind the wheel.
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