Engaged in deep conversation with 'The Missus' in bed the other night, l expressed my well-informed belief that, should she be in a king size bed, in an open field, she would still manage to find something to moan about. There would still be an elbow, a cold foot or a snore to moan about (moaning being her favourite pastime), or how she couldn’t sleep, she was too hot, freezing or something else.
I further put it to her that in life generally, if she had her 'moaning muscle' removed, she would be from that point forever silent.

She countered with, if my 'sarcasm bone' were also removed, Grumpy Towers would be completely noiseless.

What a bloody cheek!!