A MUM has told how she helps other victims of domestic violence at the women’s refuge she credits with saving her life.
The volunteer fled her family home in East London, grabbed her son from school and drove west with no idea where they were going to stay.
Manipulated and physically abused by her partner, she says she had dark thoughts at her lowest ebb and owes her life to Swindon Women’s Refuge.
The woman, who asked not to be named, said: “If it wasn’t for the refuge I wouldn’t be here. My situation was critical. I was very depressed and it got very close to the line. The refuge was absolutely phenomenal and I could be on the phone blubbing at any time of the day or night and know there would be someone there.
“The workers know everything about me and my children and I got my life back with their help. Since then I have never been able to tear myself away.”
She described how she grabbed her son from school one day in 2003 and just drove.
“When I fled with my son I was at breaking point,” she said. “I wanted to leave on the Monday after school but my partner changed his plans to be at home. He went out, so I loaded up the car. I drove to the school and ran in and told my son ‘we’ve got to go’. As I drove I kept looking in the mirror, even though I knew my partner was in London.”
The woman headed west and stayed in a hotel before contacting Shelter, who could only find one place – at the refuge in Swindon.
She went back to her partner, but the abuse worsened, and she returned once more in 2006 and stayed for two years before moving to her own home.
It turned out to be a lifeline. This time she found the strength to leave - for good.
“I had to hit rock bottom to get back up again,” she said. “But I couldn’t have done it without the help and support at the refuge.
“I still have the psychological scars and even now I flinch if I see a man who looks like my partner in the street. But I know the refuge will always be there for me. I spend every spare minute I have there.”
The refuge, which lists its address as a PO Box for security reasons, is a voluntary organisation providing advice, support, advocacy and emergency accommodation.
The woman’s work includes settling in women and children, preparing rooms, escorting residents out and gardening.
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